Getting Old Sucks

By: Anne Corke

May 10 2022

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Category: Life stories, Rants

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All you young people out there, take heed. Old age is coming to get you and it’ll be here faster than you think!

Many years ago, when I was young (really young!), it seemed that everyone around me was older. And then one day it all changed. Suddenly I realized that I was no longer the youngest in any context. In fact, I seemed to have skipped middle age and catapulted right to decrepitude. What an awful shock. The professionals that I deal with were suddenly closer to my son’s age than mine. That was the first clue.

As the coordinator for our local therapy dog group, I am in the habit of reading the obituaries in the paper before anything else to check if any of our friends in the community have passed away. Now I’m seeing more and more obituaries of people in my age group. The second clue.

Someone posted on Facebook ‘If nothing hurts in the morning, I’ll know I’m dead.’ Yes, I can relate. I’ve got more aches and pains in more places than I would ever have imagined. The third clue. It’s much quicker to tally the parts that don’t hurt than those that do. I now understand why ‘mature’ folks often go on about their afflictions as they impact the quality of life each and every day.

And with all those aches and pains, sleep has become a highly valued commodity. There always seems to be something interfering with a good night’s sleep, be it trips to the bathroom, the aforementioned aches and pains, buzzing in the ears, indigestion, pillows that don’t support your neck, mattresses that don’t support your body, wrinkly fitted sheets (The Princess and the Pea syndrome), peculiar noises that your house only makes when you are trying to fall asleep and which sometimes require investigation, sudden doubts as to whether or not you locked all the doors, also requiring investigation – the list goes on. The fourth clue. I consider it a win if I get four or five hours of sleep at a stretch.

That’s why we ‘old folks’ are usually grumpy, we’re tired and we hurt. So please cut us some slack and be kind and patient with us. Remember that it won’t be long before you’re in our situation, wondering what the hell happened! You may think you have all the time in the world but you are mistaken.

Copyright 2022 Anne Corke